* Simple, everyday tips to nurture your blended family now
* Co-parenting advice for single parents
* Preparation and tips for getting married with children
The Ultimate Resource for Engaged Couples, Seriously Dating and Newlywed Couples with Children from Previous Relationships or Marriages that will form Blended Families
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Are you a . . . .
• single parent who is overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to balance your child, career, and a dating life with little help from your childs parent and loads of drama?
• single parent who is dealing with being denied seeing your child, tired of your child support payments being raised at every opportunity and are being portrayed as a bad parent to your son or daughter?
• stepparent or someone who is dating someone with children, and find yourself spinning your wheels trying to fit into the role of an instant parent, all while being caught in the crossfire between your mate, your stepchildren, and the ex?
• seriously dating, engaged, or newlywed couple who is (or will become) married with children and trying to figure out how to blend raising children from a previous relationship with getting married?
Believe me, you are not alone.
And you are in the right place. I've experienced many of the same frustrations, doubts, and anger you are going through, and trying to understand at this very moment. In the next few minutes, Ill reveal to you the blueprint for successfully living in a blended family and having a happy, long-lasting marriage.
But not just a text book version of what sounds right from people who may not be able to truly relate to your issues. And no, I am not talking about The 21 Ways to Become The Brady Bunch or WWWJD (you know, What would Will and Jada Do?).
I want to share with you answers you can quickly apply, and create the type of mindset that will be more beneficial to your children, marriage, and your peace of mind.
Blended families have become the new norm
More and more people are having children before marriage, and the reality is that most people who do have children before marriage, end up marrying someone other than the parent of their child. Add to that the rising rate of divorce and remarriages and about 1300 new blended families are created in the U.S. everyday.
In fact statistics show that:
• 50 percent of all Americans are involved in some type of blended or stepfamily relationship, which is about 75 million Americans.
• 30 million children under the age of 13 are currently living with one biological parent and that parents current partner.
• And, 1 in 3 people are a stepchild, stepsibling, or stepparent.
Many people are also getting married later in life, which means the chances are extremely high that when they do marry someone or get in a serious relationship, that person (or sometimes both people) will usually have a child, sometimes MORE THAN one child with them.
Some other concerns are:
• If you are single and looking to get in a serious relationship, or get married, how do you find someone who is a fit for you and your child?
• Once you find the perfect one, how do you literally BLEND your family?
• And just what IS the role of a Stepparent? Do you have the love of your life, but NO control or input when it comes to their child?
But here's the bad news .... if you go into your new marriage with blinders on and without realistic expectations of marriage and knowledge of how to deal with the challenges of being in a blended family, you are going to be in for the FIGHT of your life. That means though you have the mate you always hoped for, you cant fully enjoy your marriage because you dont know or understand how to deal with the challenges that come with your new blended family and marriage in general.
So, whats the solution?
Listen, I feel for you, and know your situation because I have been there myself
Experience is a good teacher? Yup, thats my story.
By profession I have been a celebrity makeup artist and image consultant for over 15 years. My job has always been about transformation. I help people see who they really are visually, which affects their entire lives and the way they feel about themselves.
In terms of family, I guess you could say I've ALWAYS been in a blended family. When my parents married, my father had a son from a previous relationship. And when they divorced, my mom became a single parent.
I grew up going back and forth visiting my Dad, occasionally spent time with my brother, met my Dads new girlfriends, and actually ended up with not one but TWO different stepfamilies. Needless to say, I had a fully blended family experience by age 17!
When three of my closest friends had children our freshman year in college, I got exposed to yet another aspect of the blended family experience as I saw my friends dealing with little support from their children's parent, struggling to finish school, and raising their children.
Then I met Prince Charming plus two.
As I started having ideas of marriage, I decided that when I got married, I wanted to STAY HAPPILY married. And when I pictured my wedding day, I saw my future husband and I standing alone and starting our lives together just the two of us.
And then it happened! Yes! Prince Charming found me, glass slipper in hand, as we vowed our love to each other for eternity, and he whisked me off to Blendedville to live happily ever after. But what I did not expect, on the way to my not-so-new castle, was that we would pick up two, little adorable travelers that would go on the journey with us! Oh, and by the way, did I mention that my carriage had to stop to pick up my little travelers at two different houses?
Now, a young princess in my new blended world, I had no map or compass to guide me through the blended journey, and I had'nt realized the true effect my ready-made family would have on my own marriage and future children.
So if my towns name was Blendedville, then my streets name was definitely Reality, as I received real, on the job training, and we all made mistakes that turned into life lessons along the way.
The reality is that blended families are hard.
Very quickly after I started living as a new wife and instant stepparent, I realized that in time of crisis, people draw off of what they know, what they have observed, and what they have experienced.
After nearly 15 years of living in my own blended family, I realize my family is NOT perfect we have had our share of trials.... but I can say that having a full well rounded blended family experience my entire life gave me a perspective and the opportunity to walk in a variety of "shoes" that have forever changed how I view blended families.
I've Learned a Lot, and Want to Share It With You...
While in the middle of a tough time in my own blended family, it occurred to me that there needed to be a guide to provide people with solutions that were trying to live, thrive, and more so, survive, in a blended family. I always felt, if only people knew what to expect on the blended family journey. If only I could tell them what was behind door #1, 2, 3, and 4!
Imagine If . . .
•You had more support from your childs parent, could see your children regularly, and child support was not an issue anymore?
•You knew exactly how to deal with the conflict with the baby mama/baby daddy drama, in fact you could predict exactly when it would occur and know how to respond?
•You were armed with a way to determine if the relationship was really over between your boyfriend/girlfriend and their ex, and if they were really ready for marriage?
•You could create a balanced, respectful, and need I say, fun atmosphere in your blended household?
•Before you got married with children, you could know exactly what you are getting in to, and have
a plan to win?
•Reading and applying this book in your relationship could help you avoid getting divorced later?
THE SOLUTION ? Inside The Blended Family Survival Guide you
will find realistic and transparent advice that will give you the tools,
tips, and help for your family to be successful and happy in your blended family!
